It’s hard to care…

It’s hard to care…ya know what I mean?

I mean, if you care, you can be disappointed. If you care, you can get in arguments. If you care, you can lose. If you care, your heart can be broken.

I’m predominantly speaking of the elections yesterday and fighting to keep other scenarios away.

Don’t worry…I won’t go into the specific issues since I’m betting YOU care, too…but therein lies my dilemma!

You see, YOU might be against what I am for and for what I am against. That would mean that what makes me happy makes you sad and vice versa. You may even be disappointed in ME for feeling the way I do…and if you told ME, I might feel the same. Who knows? It may even cause us to “come to blows”! (Hahaha! Not really!) ; )

It’s a fact of life…you win, you lose. Ya can’t get around it. So, what’re you to do? Do you just choose not to care??? Is it possible to shut your brain off and build a wall around your heart? Is that an option anyone would even WANT to consider??? Shye…NOO! Hello! No way!

Besides, what’s the point of living if you don’t LIVE? You’ve just GOT to know what you love and hate…even just like and dislike. In many ways, life is about trying to find ways to have as much of the things and people you like around you and as little of those things and people that you don’t. That’s why we form opinions and vote...because we don’t live in a vacuum even if we wish we could. ; )

Choices. Decisions. Those are either good words or bad words depending on who you are. For me…they’re usually good words. I don’t struggle making decisions as much as some others that I know. The hard part is that we don’t always know whether our choices will bring what we hope they will. And another person may choose to take a different route (aka choice or decision) to answer the same issue than we would. Alright…NOW those words are beginning to sound like bad words! Hahaha!

But who in his or her right mind would want their right to make choices and decisions go away??? None of us. The hard part is that we don’t get to make all of our own decisions. Parents, bosses, spouses and politicians are among the most common people who also make decisions “for” us. ; ..

And in the case of the election…all the other voters have a say in making decisions for us. And as much as we hate that, it sure beats having a dictator (whom none of us chose) making the choices that please him/her without regard to our happiness or wishes.

I am reminded that it is GOD who gave us this ability and permission to choose…and whether or not you choose HIM or even believe IN Him, I choose to believe in Him and be grateful this ability to choose. And I must say, the alternative of no-choice is not desirable nor acceptable. So, I guess I should be saying, “Thank You, God!”

As far as my original comments on caring, I was thinking about caring enough to make a choice about things in life, in particular, the political issues. I was also thinking about the fallout of sharing your thoughts with others and their respective responses. When I spoke to my husband about it, he reminded me of Shakespeare’s quote: “To thine own self be true”. I took that to mean that you should be true to yourself and not worry what others think. I agreed but as I continue to think about it, I find myself only agreeing in part.

You see, often we need to influence others so that we can collectively work towards accomplishing goals that bring good and reduce negative things in our world which affects our lives so we must work together, we must talk about it…and yes, we must vote. Sometimes, we’ll be voting for people that will make decisions for us and we want them to represent us and our beliefs well. That’s why we can’t just keep our mouths shut. All things are not in our control…and we cannot even have an influence on things that happen in our world if we keep our mouths shut.

And life goes on…and some of what happens we don’t like and so we complain about them…until someday someone comes along and changes them…or a lot of people go out to vote and their votes change them. But how did that even come to a vote except someone opened their mouth and showed they cared enough to try to make a difference? Only then could others learn of it and if they agreed, were able to join and help make their world a better place…according to THEM.

So, yes…it’s hard to care…it even hurts to care…but care we must…or we will die horribly alone, having lived a life not of our own choosing, not caring nor enjoying anything much…maybe even bitter…oops…if you don’t care, I guess you can’t be bitter, can you? No, this life, if it were possible, would be a life of endless monotony and lacking in either pleasure or disappointment. I’m pretty sure that’s not even possible although it reminds me of another quote I heard somewhere: “If you don’t have any expectations, you won’t be disappointed.” There’s a lot of ways to interpret that saying but today, I’ve added a new one than I’ve ever thought about before.

So, where do we go from here? To care or not to care? That is the question…but then again, maybe it isn’t. Maybe we can’t help but care. Maybe it is in HOW we express our caring and what we do to bring about a measure of success in those things we care about. Maybe we need to learn HOW to care, HOW MUCH or LITTLE to care and WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT? Ahhh, those seem like the better questions. Along with them, we may need to learn how to handle the disappointments, when to “turn off” our caring, what the boundaries are in our caring for others. We could probably learn better ways of communicating our “cares”, too. There are inappropriate ways and times to share, I’m sure you’ll agree.

Well, I must say that I feel better than I did when I began this blog. I was “smarting” from the losses at the polls on issues I care about. I was disappointed once again with some of the people elected to office…those who will be making decisions “on my behalf” that will affect me and my life. In my disappointment, I felt the urge to run…to not participate in the process again…but how can I benefit from that?

Maybe I need to remind myself that “this, too, shall pass”…this pain that I hate so much. Maybe instead I should use this pain for gain, reminding myself that next time, maybe I should consider getting involved in the political process, helping others to hear my position. Yes, there will be those who disagree…and the worst part is that some may disagree very disagreeably…but some will agree very agreeably, too…and maybe even change their vote once they understand and agree…and only then we can become a team to help change our world and our choices.

Okay, it’s official…I choose to continue to care…even if it hurts! And I choose to remember that each of us has that same right…even if what others care about and want is different than what I care about and want…and I will respect them in their choices and if I disagree, I will try to do it agreeably, remembering that I do not have to respect what they’ve chosen, only their right to choose.

It occurs to me that this is what God does. He does not approve of many of our choices but He allows us to make them. As sad as it makes Him, He doesn’t remove our right to make the choice. One thing is certain, though; we will always reap what we’ve sown. I think that’s why we try so hard to intervene in others’ affairs, knowing that they will reap and what’s worse, we may even reap alongside them. It’s a painful way to learn and understandable that we would want to avoid it since we care so much…but there are times when the choice is not ours…and that’s just a part of life.

Whatever we do, we can’t just shut down and run and hide with our tails between our legs, licking our wounds for long. We’ve GOT to care again or we aren’t really living. (Boy, does that hit home!) So, once again, here it is: I choose this day to care…I choose life! How ’bout you?

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Home
    Aug 17, 2007 @ 21:15:15

    This is very nice and informative post. I have bookmarked your site in order to find out your post in the future.

    Reply

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